Between a simply insane weekend last weekend and being sick this weekend I have nothing in reserve to publish this week. I had gotten into a good schedule of having my posts written a week in advance. It was glorious, but now I'm finding myself playing catch up. I was scrambling to figure out what to write about when it hit me. I haven't given an Assassin/Ninja Training Update in quite a while. I actually have a lot to update on that!
Due to a very unexpected and drawn out process of injuring both my hands and waiting for them to heal properly, I haven't been doing any exercises. It has been a big lesson in patience, taking care of myself, and respecting my personal limits. Really what happened was I had a previous injury in my left hand that had healed back wrong. While that hand was reinjured so it could heal back the right way, I managed to overcompensate for it with my right hand. As a result I injured my right hand in just the same way my left hand was injured. I was so angry with myself. I had to take a long break from video games. My fine motor skills were laughable. I felt like I had unskilled clubs on the ends of my arms instead of hands. I had to ask the boys for help at work with the heavy stuff and I couldn't drive either of the trucks because that required me having to literally climb into the truck cab, which put too much strain on my hands. It has been rough but I've learned a valuable lesson and I don't plan on making that mistake again.
I have continued my plan of keeping water as my main drink. I actually counted up the time since I stopped drinking pop and I was shocked. I stopped drinking pop around 5 months ago! The crazy thing is I don't miss it. Both of my roommates still regularly drink it and I am not even tempted. I look at it and don't see it as appetizing at all. Drinking water makes me feel amazing! It's like I feel cleaner on the inside. I have more energy and that sluggish, blah feeling is gone.
On top of continuing to drink water, I have added a number of things. I now have an accountability partner. This have been so helpful. Sometimes you just don't feel like doing the work and you're okay with letting yourself down. But letting someone else down is a different matter. The accountability has majorly helped in building habits. You get used to doing healthy things and before you know it, you've created a good habit. Right now I'm just going over basic things. Most of my life I have done a horrible job at taking care of myself. My basic check in things with my partner are: Eating 3 meals a day, drinking 50 oz of water, getting at least 7 hours of sleep, not stressing my injured hands, and keeping my room organized. That last one sounds really random, but it's amazing how much having a clean and organized room helps with my mental health. Visual noise and clutter don't help anxiety.
The accountability is set up in report form. I write out daily reports. Honestly, just recording my daily progress is helpful and keeps me aware of my daily choices. I report on the items I listed above, as well as adding how I felt that day and what my big picture circumstances were that day. It gives some helpful context. As someone with an anxiety disorder, recording the big picture circumstances of my day helps me see patterns, identify triggers, and just be more aware of how stressors affect my health. I've learned so much about myself and my health through this process!
As far as results go, I don't own a scale so I can't give an actual weight loss amount. I can say that I need a new belt. I started out only being able to reach the first hole on my current belt. Now I am on the farthest hole and still shrinking. I have gone down a shirt size and two jeans sizes. I have learned how important taking care of myself physically is to my mental health. The two cannot be separated. Just working on physical health greatly improves my mental health. With better mental health I'm better equipped to make healthy decisions. It's become an awesome upward spiral. That's a real thing!
If you have PTSD, some other anxiety disorder, or any mental disorder try making healthy decisions for your body. I know. I rolled my eyes at that advice so many times in the past. But now that I'm actually doing it and reaping the benefits, I must say it is definitely worth it! It really works! Just start small. Do you eat 3 meals a day? Get 7 to 8 hours of sleep? Wherever you find yourself there's a small step you can take towards better health. Don't try to do it all at once. That rarely ever works. Have patience and grace for yourself. Find one thing you can stick with and do it daily. Finding an accountability partner really helps too. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and don't give up when you fall down. Just get back up. There are no penalties for falling unless you don't get back up.
That's all I have for now. Thanks for reading!
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-Jerelle
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